War on Christmas XVII, The cross-based Christmas tree

From the press release:

“When I became a Christian a few years ago,” says [“CHRIST-mas Tree” creator Marsha] Boggs, “I was appalled by the secularization of the Christmas holiday. When retail stores started substituting ‘Happy Holidays’ for ‘Merry Christmas,’ and schools began calling their Christmas programs ‘Winter Plays,’ it all seemed ridiculous to me. That’s why we have created products that remind people what the Christmas season is really all about – the birth of Christ.”
The “CHRIST-mas” Tree is size adjustable up to 7.5 foot tall to accommodate various ceiling sizes. Additionally, the company offers ornaments, wreaths and gift items all with Christian-based themes.

And without further adieu, here it is!

But there is a problem here. This Boggs woman apparently rushed her conversion to Christianity and didn’t even bother reading the holy text of the religion. If she had, she might have noticed that her product would anger its alleged deity:

Hear ye the word which the LORD speaketh unto you, O house of Israel:
Thus saith the LORD, Learn not the way of the heathen, and be not dismayed at the signs of heaven; for the heathen are dismayed at them.
For the customs of the people are vain: for one cutteth a tree out of the forest, the work of the hands of the workman, with the axe.
They deck it with silver and with gold; they fasten it with nails and with hammers, that it move not.
-Jeremiah 10:1-4

I like how the pagans had to fasten the tree with nails so that it didn’t move around. You know how those trees get when they wander around all over the place.

But that’s not even the best part. That would be the price: $400! She must be one of those “prosperity gospel” types who believe that their faith will make them rich and other weird Voodoo-like stuff.

Another weird part of this is that Boggs claims that Christmas is supposed to be about the birth of Jesus, which I guess she wants to make note of by including a symbol of the… death of Jesus… It doesn’t really make sense. I know there was supposed to be the massacre of the innocents around the time of Jesus’ birth, according to the story, but I don’t think any Romans used a crucifix to kill any infants or toddlers.¬†Maybe Boggs should put a bunch of manure in with her CHRIST-mas tree, in order to make it seem a bit more consistent with the story.


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